Thursday, August 18, 2011

Barbarians at the Gate!

Epic Barbarians Cover

'New ‘Handbook for Aspiring Savages’ from Insight Editions Offers Tips and Tricks for Grabbing Life By The Neck and Choking it into Submission.

Shackle your daughters, sacrifice your pets, and kiss your 401k goodbye—the barbarians have arrived!

Ours is an age of anxiety, where nothing is certain. Economic and natural disasters surround us like sharks around a raft made of steak. But in these dark times, a new hope lights our way: The barbarians are at the gate! “What better way to solve the problems of modern civilization than to burn it to the ground?,” they ask. Will you heed the call of the man-beast?

In his refreshing new study, “Barbarians: A Handbook for Aspiring Savages” (October 2011, Insight Editions), Barbarian Studies scholar Dr. Byron Clavicle takes readers on a tour of authentic barbarian culture, led by his native informant Grüte Skullbasher and the shining examples of the Beastmaster, Deathstalker, Ator the Fighting Eagle, and the Barbarian Queen. Together, Clavicle and Skullbasher cover the basics of barbarianism, offering an introduction to the savage lifestyle accessible to even the most repressed, silk-wearin', flower sniffin' dilettante.

“Barbarians: A Handbook for Aspiring Savages” doesn’t pull any punches or cover any nipples: this is an unflinching summary of good, old-fashioned gritty antisocial values. This back-to-basics primer tells readers how to fight back against the woes of the age, using methods dating back to humankind's days of roasting dinosaurs—methods that have served us well far into the post-apocalyptic wastelands of our B-movie imaginations.

Includes features like:
  • Combat: A How-to Guide
  • Know Your Villains!
  • Barbarian Mathematics
  • The BAT (Barbarian Aptitude Test) . . . 
. . . as well as cultural explorations such as:
  • Portraits of Great Barbarians
  • Barbarian Music
  • A Barbarian Film Guide 
  • Barbarian Cuisine 
  • How to Dress Like a Barbarian 
Using a unique approach that blends history and pop-culture incarnations of barbarianism, “Barbarians: A Handbook for Aspiring Savages” presents touchstones for how to work toward a more savage future. Clavicle and Skullbasher call for a merciless attitude toward life’s frustrations, advocating the use of tried-and-true methods of brawn and brutality to regain control of our otherwise worthless lives.


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